The Other Side of the Glass

Part One was officially released June 2013 in digital distribution format. To purchase to to If you were a donor and want to download your copy send an email to

The trailer

Tuesday, March 27, 2007


The average child hears "no" or "don't" 40,000-50,000 times before the age of five. This works out to about 30-40 times a day from birth on. When I heard this information while I was carrying my first child Tiger, it upset me. It seemed there was entirely too much negativity being passed on to children from day one and the concurrent effect on their lives in hearing so many "no's" and "don't's". I resolved to find another way to communicate and to pass on clear language skills to my yet to be born child.

-- Paradise Star Newland, Dolphin Researcher, Domestic Harmony Inititative and Safe Baby Resolution, Hawaii.

More about energy and intention, brain neuro chemicals and development -- because we connect and co-create our world, and we affect others around us. This is extraordinarily important whenever any of us interacts with a woman who is "with child", and a laboring and birthing baby and woman.

The word "pregnant" is such a clinical word. "With child" says it all. How we treat a mother and her baby in utero or ever is imporant to making birth safe. A child who is well cared for, nutured, in a harmonic, peaceful world from gestation on will be just that -- caring, nurturing, hamonious, peaceful.

I co-wrote the Safe Baby Resolution being heard in the Hawaii Legislature with my colleague there, Star Paradise Newland. Star sculpted it -- and, I learned this is far different from "editing." Recently, I began to incorporate her teaching of using the word, ZERO rather than "no", "not", "don't", "can't", etc. Read about using ZERO to change the ENERGY of your thoughts and feelings.

From her article, "What Zero Means to Me, Star says,

Specific neurochemicals are generated when we think, hear or speak words. When words feel good then they stimulate the production of feel good (yummy) neurochemicals. It makes sense that when we say words that generate yummy neurochemicals we feel better. As we feel better then we perceive our life and the world in a better way, which in turn helps us create more yummy neurochemicals which helps us create/perceive a better world view and so on.

Changing our use of language can influence our life profoundly. As it does then our world changes profoundly, experientially and actually. Together even a few committed people can influence the world deeply by using this conscious approach to their language. There is a kind of ripple effect because of the harmonics involved in expressing our higher consciousness intentionally.

This is because everything entrains to the highest frequency - ultimately. The zero point being the intersection of light and love is a very high frequency.

Because the outer world is a reflection of our inner world then by stilling ourselves and going to the zero point we influence the world's state. Going to this zero state resonates with the zero state of what surrounds us as it is a higher, more stable vibration as well as fundamental to all life. It is like this is ground zero, where it all springs from. Love. Light. Coming into manifestation.

The concept of going to a zero state as an intention to bestill myself came to me recently. When something comes up that can fluster or really upset me I tell myself to go to zero. It is like resetting an innate mechanism that restores internal silence, reconnects with the inner unity, and allows me to stay centered in the moment as well as in the center of my being. This center is the interface between my soul and its expression through me in my life, in this world, this moment.

Using zero in language and every day life Star explains Language Sculpting:

Language Sculpting

- A Living Technology

Years ago in a meditation the information came that I would create a new style of language that was holographic in essence. It has taken this time to play with it, explore it, share it, and watch it grow. Out here in Puna, Hawai'I where Madame Pele's lava flows to the ocean and I continue my dolphin researches, a number of my ohana (kin circle or pod) play with this concept of 'sculpting new realities' through the conscious use of language. We play with it like a game and it is highly satisfying and Fun! to catch ourselves mid-word and do what is called a 'sculpt' as we see and feel what we would like to consciously choose next.

Intention activates our will. When we say, "I intend to maintain a good relationship with my children", we can create a feeling picture that is a clear thought form and empower it with our will. We can see/create the picture that accompanies it. WE are sculpting that reality by cutting away anything superfluous.

This is the essence of language sculpting and how it came to be called. The image comes from the jade carvers of old, who would sit for up to several years with the jade and when the perfect form was revealed they would carve. Intricate pieces, taking years to complete would result in only one teaspoon of jade dust being left at the end.Language sculpting is more immediate than that. Although it is like the sculpting of old in that in a piece of writing or in our own thoughtforms, we might have only to remove or sculpt a few words to reveal the perfect reality we wish to create.

Sculpting is about unifying realities within ourselves by reconciling opposites, duality thinking to complements or whole thinking. We feel much better when we can reconcile two highly divergent aspects within ourselves into a united self.

It is a meta-technology in that whatever you are doing, in what ever language, language sculpting can enhance it.If you do counseling, law, teaching, passing on language skills to children, sales, coaching, creative thinking, writing, or life, sculpting yourself would improve communications and results substantially.

If you want to create wellbeing or greater soundness in yourself or others it is very effective. As we think so shall it be. Better to say, "I wish my head felt better", than "My headache is killing me.

Everything a woman feels, thinks, and experiences becomes part of her experience. Anyone, doctor or midwife, friend or mother-in-law, must take care to know their own intentions, energetic patterns, and feelings when they engage with a mother. Doctors, nurses, and midwives can learn to sculpt their language and to remove the negative worlds from their vocabular when caring for laboring and birthing baby and mom.

No comments:

"Soft is the heart of a child. Do not harden it."

A public awareness reminder that things that happen behind the scenes, out of our sight, aren't always as rosy as we might think them to be. Perhaps its a restaurant cook who accidentally drops your burger on the floor before placing it on the bun and serving it to you. Here it's an overworked apathetic (pathetic) nurse giving my newborn daughter her first bath. Please comment and rate this video, so as to insure that it is viewed as widely as possible, perhaps to prevent other such abuse. -- The mother who posted this YouTube. How NOT to wash a baby on YouTube Are you going to try to tell me that "babies don't remember?" There is no difference to this baby's experience and the imprinting of her nervous system/brain and one that is held and cleaned by the mother or father either at the hospital or at home? By the way, this is probably NOT the baby's first bath. The nurse is ungloved. Medical staff protocol is that they can't handle a baby ungloved until is has been bathed (scrubbed if you've seen it) because the baby is a BIO-HAZARD -- for them. Never mind that the bio-hazard IS the baby's first line of defense against hospital germs.

Missouri Senator Louden Speaks

Finally, A Birth Film for Fathers

Part One of the "The Other Side of the Glass: Finally, A Birth Film for and about Men" was released June, 2013.

Through presentation of the current research and stories of fathers, the routine use of interventions are questioned. How we protect and support the physiological need of the human newborn attachment sequence is the foundation for creating safe birth wherever birth happens.

Based on knowing that babies are sentient beings and the experience of birth is remembered in the body, mind, and soul, fathers are asked to research for themselves what is best for their partner and baby and to prepare to protect their baby.

The film is designed for midwives, doulas, and couples, particularly fathers to work with their caregivers. Doctors and nurses in the medical environment are asked to "be kind" to the laboring, birthing baby, and newborn. They are called to be accountable for doing what science has been so clear about for decades. The mother-baby relationship is core for life. Doctors and nurses and hospital caregivers and administrators are asked to create protocols that protect the mother-baby relationship.

Men are asked to join together to address the vagaries of the medical system that harm their partner, baby and self in the process of the most defining moments of their lives. Men are asked to begin to challenge the system BEFORE they even conceive babies as there is no way to be assured of being able to protect his loved ones once they are in the medical machine, the war zone, on the conveyor belt -- some of the ways that men describe their journey into fatherhood in the medicine culture.

Donors can email to get a digital copy.
Buy the film at

The film focuses on the male baby, his journey from the womb to the world and reveals healing and integrating the mother, father, and baby's wounded birth experience. The film is about the restoring of our families, society, and world through birthing loved, protected, and nurtured males (and females, of course). It's about empowering males to support the females to birth humanity safely, lovingly, and consciously.

Finally, a birth film for fathers.

What People Are Saying About the FIlm

Well, I finally had a chance to check out the trailer and .. wow! It's nice that they're acknowledging the father has more than just cursory rights (of course mom's rights are rarely acknowledged either) and it's great that they're bringing out the impact of the experience on the newborn, but I'm really impressed that they're not shying away from the political side.

They are rightly calling what happens in every American maternity unit, every day, by its rightful name - abuse. Abuse of the newborn, abuse of the parents and their rights, abuse of the supposedly sacrosanct ethical principal of patient autonomy and the medico-legal doctrine of informed consent, which has been long ago discarded in all but name. I love it!

In the immortal words of the "shrub", "bring it on!" This film needs to be shown and if I can help facilitate or promote it, let me know.

Father in Asheville, NC

OMG'ess, I just saw the trailer and am in tears. This is so needed. I watch over and over and over as fathers get swallowed in the fear of hospitals birth practice. I need a tool like this to help fathers see how very vital it is for them to protect their partner and baby. I am torn apart every time I see a father stand back and chew his knuckle while his wife is essentially assaulted or his baby is left to lie there screaming.
Please send me more info!!!!
Carrie Hankins
CD(DONA), CCCE, Aspiring Midwife

Thanks for sharing this. It was very touching to me. I thought of my brother-in-law standing on the other side of the glass when my sister had to have a C-section with her first child because the doctor was missing his golf date. I'll never forget his pacing back and forth and my realizing that he was already a father, even though he hadn't been allowed to be with his son yet.

Margaret, Columbia, MO

In case you don't find me here

Soon, I'll be back to heavy-duty editing and it will be quiet here again. I keep thinking this blog is winding down, and then it revives. It is so important to me.

I wish I'd kept a blog of my journey with this film this past 10 months. It's been amazing.

I have a new blog address for the film, and will keep a journal of simple reporting of the journey for the rest of the film.

I'll be heading east this week to meet with a group of men. I plan to post pictures and clips on the film blog.

I'll keep up here when I can -- when I learn something juicy, outrageous, or inspiring related to making birth safer for the birthing baby.

Review of the film

Most of us were born surrounded by people who had no clue about how aware and feeling we were. This trailer triggers a lot of emotions for people if they have not considered the baby's needs and were not considered as a baby. Most of us born in the US were not. The final film will include detailed and profound information about the science-based, cutting-edge therapies for healing birth trauma.

The full film will have the interviews of a wider spectrum of professionals and fathers, and will include a third birth, at home, where the caregivers do a necessary intervention, suctioning, while being conscious of the baby.

The final version will feature OBs, RNs, CNMs, LM, CPM, Doulas, childbirth educators, pre and perinatal psychologists and trauma healing therapists, physiologists, neurologists, speech therapists and lots and lots of fathers -- will hopefully be done in early 2009.

The final version will include the science needed to advocated for delayed cord clamping, and the science that shows when a baby needs to be suctioned and addresses other interventions. Experts in conscious parenting will teach how to be present with a sentient newborn in a conscious, gentle way -- especially when administering life-saving techniques.

The goal is to keep the baby in the mother's arms so that the baby gets all of his or her placental blood and to avoid unnecessary, violating, and abusive touch and interactions. When we do that, whether at home or hospital, with doctor or midwife, the birth is safe for the father. The "trick" for birthing men and women is how to make it happen in the hospital.

Birth Trauma Healing

Ani DeFranco Speaks About Her Homebirth

"Self-Evident" by Ani DeFranco

Patrick Houser at

Colin speaks out about interventions at birth